Am I Really Infertile?

I can remember the exact moment where my worldfor a year or more with no positive results. Now, this
was pulled away from me. Trying to get pregnantis obviously very different from my take on infertility.
for over four years and clinging on to hope that "ItTo me, if you are infertile it means you cannot have
would happen when the time was right" and "Youchildren. Ever. At All. It's very final. But what the
just have to be patient". My partner and had beenmedical definition of infertility describes is a decreased
working with a fertility specialist for some time andability to get pregnant. Reduced fertility would be a
he had laid out a simple path for us to follow. If onebetter term for it. So, if you have been told you are
thing didn't work there was another option to try,infertile, don't take that to mean there is no way you
and 'give time' to. And then he asked the questionwill ever have children. There is a very good chance
which changed my whole view on my situation. "Dothat you will.
you have any other medical problems...apart fromLet's talk statistics. And forgive me as I twist these
infertility?"a little to make my point. Between 65 and 90
What?percent of couples will conceive in their first year of
It was the first time anyone had actually referred totrying. 90 to 95% will conceive in their first two
me as infertile and it was like a slap in the face. If Iyears of trying, and the remaining 5% will take longer
was infertile....why were we even trying all thesethan 2 years. Interpreting those figure a little - up to
expensive treatments to conceive. Infertile? The35% of couples will not have conceived in their first
word rang around my head for what seemed likeyear trying. But of that 35% - 30% will have
ages until the specialist rephrased his question in aconceived by the end of their second year. That
different way, thinking I hadn't understood(Yea..causemeans that of those who are deemed 'infertile' by
I'm stupid AND infertile).the medical definition, up to 86% will have conceived
It was also the point I stopped blindly following thewithin a year. That doesn't sound very infertile to me!
advise of others, and started doing my own workNow, obviously I took the highest numbers of
and research. Ironically I was pregnant within 3'infertility' to twist those figures a little, but it does
months of 'dropping' the medical approach, but that ismake my point. Just because a doctor refers to you
a story for another day. Today I want to tell youas infertile does not mean you have to give up all
about what it really means when your doctor callshope of ever having children. You merely have a
you infertile and why that doesn't mean you shouldreduced fertility rate, which just means you have to
give up hope of having children.try a little harder and be prepared to wait a little
Infertile, as defined by doctors and specialists meanslonger. It's a relatively small price to pay for the
that you have been actively trying to get pregnanthonor of being a mum.